Friday, July 20, 2012

Off the Wall


is what you call someone odd, eccentric, one brick shy. 
Like that woman seen walking all over town
dressed in black, talking to herself or perhaps to God.

Like that man in church on the front row, eyes closed tight, feigning sleep, his heart remaining open as morning glories reaching toward the sun.


The girl who holds an orphaned squirrel in her bra like a newborn in a snugly, appeased by mamma’s heartbeat. She sneaks him an occasional acorn through the neckline of her tee.

A daughter who could have made good like her mother in nuclear physics but doesn’t. Rather than succeed as such, she’ll stay in touch with her inner child (thank you very much.), shaping owls and salamanders out of clay…

Transforming Altoid tins into treasures. She’ll go to sleep and paint
her dreams in the morning, measure truth by their content…

When she sees a hall at school, students herded along by a bell – a bell!
– she thinks of Pavlov’s dogs and how thrilled she feels to be skipping
 down the wall – that’s right, the wall

- beside the girl with the squirrel in her bosom. 

~  

The last four lines reveal an unforgettable dream I had, where I was skipping along the wall with an artist friend.  How paradoxical dreams can be. We weren’t the ones off the wall. It’s the others in the herd.  Isn’t life a paradox though?   


"'Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: "What! You too?
Thought I was the only one....'"C. S. Lewis


How much of a rebel are you?  Are you off the wall too?  How so?
What idiosyncrasy would you dare to share below?  



66 comments:

  1. Certainly quite the dream, Debra! Skipping down the wall . . . just love the image of that!
    I think I may have mentioned before that in growing up, I was the square peg that everyone tried to put in the round hole. Unfortunately for me, I became a shape-shifter, a people-pleaser. Wasted a lot of precious time worrying about "fitting-in", but I did learn some powerful life lessons.
    Some people may think I'm odd because I prefer staying at home with my family and my writing as opposed to socializing/partying. They probably think I'm missing out on the fun, but they don't know about the astounding places I visit in my own imagination. :)
    Beautiful post, Debra, as always, dear friend!
    Blessings to you!

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    1. It is an odd image. Dreams are so telling, and let us know who we really are ;-) In this case, the happy-go-lucky oddball. Martha, I can’t imagine you as shape-shifter. You seem solid as a rock to me. But maybe your groundedness came later in life? Writers, some say, are not social creatures as much as loners who dwell more in the inner world of imagination than in the outer world. That would be us. Maybe that’s why we hit it right off!

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    2. Martha you sound a lot like me - really. I am an absolute homebody even though I'm quite gregarious. It's only now that I have really come in to my own and am happy to be 'on the wall/off the wall'...What a lovely dream, Debra. Perhaps, you're right about the writers being loners essentially, lost in our own thoughts and dreams and pulled out of them reluctantly from time to time. Aren't we blessed to have 'found' each other though? Here we go traipsing on the wall! ♥

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    3. Corinne, hide will you! I almost missed you way up here responding to Martha. You are on-the- wall/off- the-wall? Yeah, I guess you are. You are more sociable, more practical, more in touch with the outer world. I can’t help but struggle to pull myself back to this side of reality. You have such a grasp on pragmatism, even though I can see you skipping along the wall with me too – but I don’t know that you’d make it a habit ;-)

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  2. Love this dream and the telling of it! "She’ll go to sleep and paint her dreams in the morning, measure truth by their content… " Beautiful line! Also love that you were skipping on the wall. Wonderful image! I completely agree that dreams reveal (at least for me) the truth, in many cases, about who we are at our innermost core. Thank you.

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    1. Terri, dreams do reveal the truth about us, our circumstances, our deepest selves. When our conscious minds, our facades, our egos are asleep we see truth unveiled. And you know what? I feel more myself in dreams than in waking reality, as strange as that may seem.

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  3. hey i thought pavlov's example was suited on me:p,By the way i am not rebel but a cowardic:p

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    1. Zarnab, I'm not sure what you mean by Pavlov's example... please explain.

      A coward? What are you afraid of Zarnab?
      I'm here, talk to me.

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    2. pavlov's experiment on dogs when dog saw the food so started salivation,and i am coward by nature i am not so much bold expectations scare me,so by nature i am coward:)

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  4. Hi Debra:
    I seem to recall a similar post you wrote about eccentric people awhile back. Anyway, I think most artists whether they create w/words pictures or sculptures have SOME otherness, some oddness to them.

    For me, writing is the way I release that otherness.
    Idiosyncrasies/Dreaming:
    Speaking of dreams, I haven't had this happen in some time, but I sometimes can experience Lucid Dreaming, where I know that I'm in a dream and can sometimes manipulate the dream to my liking. Several years ago I had a few prophetic dreams. I think it's because I've always been hyper sensitive to the spiritual realm.

    Another experience I tend to have is people close to me who have passed recently visit me in my dreams. Again I believe this happens because of my hyper sensitivity.
    --
    Chris

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    1. Chris, lucid dreams, prophetic dreams… me too. The reason you remember them is because of your hypersensitivity to that realm, which is no less reality than what the conscious mind perceives, though many in our western culture undermine the significance of the inner world, particularly the language of dreams. They can be instructional, or they can warn you ahead of time of impending disaster. I’d love to hear some of you prophetic dreams sometime. Also the lucid ones where you altered reality.

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    2. At some point...
      ...soon I MAY blog about some of them. I'll give you advance notice BEFORE they go live.
      --
      Chris

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  5. Dreams can be interesting. I love listening to other people's. Glad you shared this one! I'm not sure how "off the wall" I am in real life but in my dreams I certainly can be. I've had ones where I've been climbing outside of spaceships. lol

    I think sometimes dreams can tell us a lot about ourselves.

    Great post. :)

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    1. Jessica, whatever happened to Dream Bucket? I loved your blog idea! I need a place to drop off my dreams. A place to read those of others and discuss.

      You have this space thing going on, which I find most intriguing. It tells me that you are a born explorer. And waking reality shows me that you are just that. You are a pioneer, not a settler.

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  6. it's so ironic. . . not a week ago a long lost fictional heroine -- Pippi Longstocking -- made an 'appearance' from someplace deep (obviously not forgotten) in my consciousness. It got me thinking more and more about what drew me to her as a young girl. In my memory she's different, yes, but more profound is my sense of her as a girl who marches to the beat of her own drum. I mentioned it to a friend who had a similar reaction to the character and now wants to re-read at least the first book with me. I may well start a Pippi Longstocking book/fan club.

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    1. The inner world of Astrid Lindgren must have been just amazing, yes? Who could not love Pippi Longstocking? Your memory of Pippi sparks in me the desire to re-read the books myself. Wonder why she recently appeared in your consciousness? What is your psyche telling you? Interesting, Deborah. Maybe she’s the archetypal image of your wild and crazy self!
      Here’s another unconventional character I love, another redhead: Anne of Green Gables. Both Anne Shirley and Pippi marched to their own drum, which is why I must adore them so!

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  7. I couldn't take my eyes off this painting. She looks so helpless and lonely. I hardly ever remember my dreams...

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    1. Ana, maybe she is lonely, but I prefer to think of her as just an introvert who has a red squirrel to keep her company. She is almost identical to the girl I know who kept the baby squirrel in her bra while at work. But I’ve seen stranger things ;-)

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  8. I got lost in the true story of the girl who carried the squirrel in her bra. What a fscinating image! Almost mythological.

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    1. Francie,the girl's name is Eraina. She owned a coffee bar in our city. One day I noticed that her chest seemed to be wiggling, but I didn’t want to say anything in case my imagination was acting up. But then she pulled out the baby squirrel and said, “Meet Peco.” For real. But it does seem mythological.

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  9. "We weren’t the ones off the wall. It’s the others in the herd" ~ reminds me of Patch Adams... I think I've mentioned him in another post as Chris shared...

    I was reading this earlier and was not so sure how to comment :P maybe I'm thinking too much again...

    God speaks so much in dreams... I love that sense of awareness and sensitivity that you have...

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    1. Melissa, I love the comments you posted on my FB wall, the quote by Thomas à Kempis.
      'Two wings lift man above earthly things: simplicity and purity. Simplicity must be in the intention, purity in the affection. Simplicity intends God, purity comprehends him and tastes him.' I read The Imitation of Christ years ago. Then was asked to teach a class on the spiritual classics at a spiritual institute. Could you send me Jocelyn’s post? You are so astute Melissa, and always attuned with the Spirit. That’s what I love about you!

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    2. Here it is Debra :*

      http://itakeoffthemask.com/best-life-quotes/quotes-from-the-imitation-of-christ-by-thomas-kempis/

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    3. Thanks Melissa, you angel you!

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  10. Debra I love the whimsy in this post. I was a nerd in high school, but I was a "cool nerd!" I read obscure books and was interested in the opera, dressed like Prince (the singer) and performed plays that I wrote in the hallway, but I wasn't shunned as much because I think people admired my creativity. I did get beat up a few times by bullies, but that ended when I started fighting back! Lol!


    I do believe that the people we look at as being weird or eccentric have a lot to teach us and if we get beyond their differences we can learn a thing or two about the world and ourselves. Love this!

    I love the painting BTW. I had a favorite squirrel as a kid. I swear this little one would come right to me and just stare. I would give him peanuts. :-)

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    1. Oh Tameka, you were just being your authentic self, reading what interested you, openly liking the opera, dressing like Prince, performing your own plays you wrote in the hallway… you marched to your own drummer. I can see it now. You’d have been the one admired because you were, well, totally you! How did you manage to escape the mold? How did you hold your own in the midst of the herd? This is what the world needs to hear. You need to tell your amazing story, help other young people to be genuine too. Take your talents to the street and let the people see how you came out unscathed.

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  11. ---Great Post!

    Yes, I am off the wall, out of the box, strange, and all that stuff...& I prefer people like that, as well! They are more interesting.

    Xx
    Love the quote by CS Lewis.

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    1. Thank you Kim! Aren’t we more interesting though? ;-)
      Like Dr. Seuss said, "Why fit in when you were born to stand out?"

      Big hug to you on this day.
      xox

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  12. I don't know, Debra, what do you think? I used to worry I didn't fit it and then later what I once thought was important didn't matter to me any more. I've long accepted I'm a loner, which makes a person odd without even trying to be. With the onset of writing that has only made me more of one. I'd love it dearly if I had a couple writer friends that were close by - so we could do what un writer people do, met for coffee and wine, talk about ... Maybe pen pals. Anyho, I digress, am I out of the box? Something to ponder.

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    1. Brenda, your true personality shines through in your writing. The struggles, the pathos and humor, the trials and errors… you don’t write about “what ought to be” but what IS – you tell your own colorful truth. If you’re writing novels, solitude is a must. I embrace every minute of walking the lone labyrinth, of trying to figure out where I’m going, don’t you? What? You too? A toast to my long-distance pen pal! Isn’t that what bloggy friends are, sort of? Pen pals?

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  13. Hi, Debra! ~

    I'm not really a 'rebel', I just want to do what I want to do, whether others approve or not.

    What idiosyncrasy could I share that I haven't already? Hmmm...

    Yesterday I was stuck in road construction traffic so I listened to a radio show on NPR I don't usually hear called 'From the Top'. It features performances by exceptional young musicians and their stories. I became teary-eyed several times and I realized (remembered!) how much I love, love, love applause! Not just for myself, but for a job well-done!

    Thank you for asking -- It was fun remembering that!

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    1. Linda, you might be a rebel…If you’ve ever homeschooled your children…If you’ve ever left a real jerk for someone who treats you right..Rebels are misunderstood. People don’t get ‘em. I think deep down you’re one of us. You’re not all that conventional. Surely not ;-) You’re an artist. Don’t all artists have at least some rebel blood, yo.

      Did you applaud those musicians while you were in your car, waiting to move along? I’m trying to picture you in the midst of traffic crying, and then clapping for invisible musicians like you're at a concert.

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    2. Debra, You know I want to be in any club YOU are in ;-*

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    3. How about ‘The Artist Way’ Club? I love crazy artists ;-)

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  14. Love this CS Lewis quote! And I have a whole crew of kids who dream off the wall dreams each night and report the crazy tales in the morning. Artists in the make? :)

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    1. Alicia, yep. Pay attention to those off the wall dreams. Did you know that some classic literature was based on dreams? You never know ;-)

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  15. Loved this dream Debra. I dream a lot, sometimes it is easier to interpret, sometimes not. I loved that bit about the girl and the squirrel hiding in her bosom. Life is indeed a paradox!

    http://rimlybezbaruah.blogspot.in/2012/07/snapshots.html

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    1. Rimly, where have you been girl? Haven’t seen you around much lately. No, some dreams are difficult to interpret. For me, the study of dreams has helped me learn how to interpret most of mine, though some remain an enigma. I enjoy hearing others’ dreams. Had any good ones recently?

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  16. I think there's all kinds of rebels. I like to think I'm a rebel by stretching myself to live an extraordinary life and not just be content with the mundane routine. To push myself into challenging arenas not just for the sake of being different but to make a difference. I believe you can do all these things without creating what might be considered a rebel persona but still stand out from the crowd nevertheless.

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    1. Lynne, your comment reminds me of another C.S. Lewis quote. It’s not those who intend to be original or rebel or eccentric, but those who just ARE; that is the key. Here’s the quote:

      "Even in literature and art, no man who bothers about originality will ever be original: whereas if you simply try to tell the truth (without caring twopence how often it has been told before) you will, nine times out of ten, become original without ever having noticed it."
      ~ C.S. Lewis

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  17. Amazing dream images Debra! I do feel that special kinship with you, as I believe we are both a little "off the wall". I can always count on you to see beauty where others may not.

    I feel that my idiosyncracies come mostly from the fact that I will do whatever it takes to follow my heart and be true to myself. This is not an easy way to live and it certainly doesn't enable me to make friends easily. But when we find each other - oh, it's a wonderful thing.

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    1. Kristen, no it’ not an easy way to live, following your heart regardless of what others think about you. If I ever start to doubt myself, all I need do is jump over to your place and renew my vision, because you are gifted at helping women who are on the path less traveled find their way through the woods. That path can be lonely, but knowing you are there with a candle in the darkest places helps!

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  18. Debra, this post made me appreciate my off-the-wallness;) I'm the woman who walks the neighborhood eyeing the sky while stepping in time to unheard music. And you...well we know who you are. You're the woman whose dreams come true.

    This was inspiring.

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    1. We should celebrate our off-the-wallness Leah.
      Cheers to you my philosopher friend!
      Hats off to sky gazers!

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  19. Interesting things you have there in your mind Deb. I'm sure I don't have to tell you that I am off. Not sure if it's off the wall or off the grid or even off far away on an adventure of a lifetime. But, off just the same. Thank you for giving a small insight into what you think of when you're not actually thinking. Not sure if Bra Squirrels will catch on but, who knows. Hope you are having a fantastic week and even more grand dreams. <3

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    1. Jenn, that’s too funny. “I don’t have to tell you that I’m off” ;-) While I have you online, how are you doing with our man's departure from the Celtics? Are you at the ‘acceptance’ stage yet? One more thing: are you in any unschool FB sites? The other day I posted this on radical unschoolers and one woman asked what this subject had to do with unschooling ;-) Really? I found it amazing that anyone couldn’t see the connection between being off the wall and unschooling. Another lady came behind her and said, “I thought it was obvious.” There’s so much more I could say about that but I’ll spare you. Do you want to join the group? There is good conversation sometimes.

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  20. Hi Debra. :-)

    Ever since I was a teenager, I did not really conform to fads and what my peers thought was cool; I had my "own world." The world which other people will never understand. For in that world, staying in my room all day, playing the keyboards, singing, writing, reading, or doing art are far more interesting AND exciting than partying and hanging out at the mall. And when I am outdoors, I love taking photos of any colorful inanimate objects and the beauty of nature, which even my family and relatives thought was odd lol

    Cheers to us, Debra! And you -- you are too WONDERFUL being off the wall <3 <3 <3 :-)

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    1. Irene, I can tell by your spirit that you held your own as a teenager. You don’t strike me as a conformist because you are true to your spirit; your inner world and creative life shines through. And in the content of your words you convey far more depth than those who don’t know how to be alone with themselves or have time for reflection. <3 <3 <3

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  21. Dear Debra,
    You might want to come to my blog...you've been featured! For more, please click here...

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    1. Thank you Andy. Such an honor to be recognized by you!
      <3 <3 <3

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  22. Yes, I am quite "off the wall" or as some say... "way too high in the clouds." haha But, God created us all UNIQUE and different. It would be quite boring if we were all the same and then we'd all be BOUNCING off the walls. haha Thank you for sharing this! ;)

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    1. Hi Farfalla, yes, what a boring world this would be if we were all the same :-(
      Thank God we are uniquely created, fingerprints and all.

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  23. I was always taught to obey and follow those older than me. I thought this meant at all times, in all situations. So I was "good" not knowing that I lost myself in the process. Now that I'm older, I've learned to be myself and love myself for who and what I am, warts and all. I know I'm not perfect but if people I care about love me despite myself, then that's perfectly enough for me.

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    1. Anne, why is it that, while we’re young, we don’t get this? Our attitude seemed to be: you’re ok, I’m not ok. We are taught blind obedience to ‘authority’ – even when some authority figures didn’t deserve respect. Most of the time we don’t begin to really respect our own selves until later in life, until we’ve wised up. Interesting how that plays out.

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  24. I love to think we're all off the wall. I think that's the special part of seeing beautiful - or perhaps, everyone just has his/her own wall. Interesting. Provocative

    Sorry we've been away for two weeks! We're back in town from a wonderful see beautiful vacation and glad to reconnect!

    Happy seeing beautiful!
    http://seeabeautifulworld.blogspot.com/. Awesome.

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    1. Lydia, clearly, everyone isn’t off the wall. Most do march to the same drummer. But deep down maybe they want to jump up on the wall with us, you know? Maybe we could whistle the right tune and all of a sudden they’d hear and know that they’re free to jump up and join us! Yeah!
      Oh, I wish I’d been there too, on vacation seeing beauty all the while. Be over in a bit.

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  25. In many ways, I believe I'm off the wall, too. I'm currently living a life not many people would agree with, people who would say I could do this and that, and go here and there. I spent a lot of time previously in trying to adapt myself to others, but I've realized that each one of us is unique, and I must cherish the 'me' that God has gifted me to be. ;)

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    1. Joyce, it sounds like you recognize your call to follow the Shepherd and not the herd. You might be off the wall if this is the case. Those who hear the Voice in here, instead of all the many voices out there, find the courage not to conform. Aren’t you just grateful that the mask-wearing days are over?!

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  26. Debra, what an amazing dream that was. It sounded like a mute foreign animation and it played in my head as if I was right there watching the girl with a squirrel in her bosom and another kid skipping off the wall.

    I've always followed the rules in school and at home. I took care to study well, to get good-enough grades, to do all my homework, and turn up for class or appointments in time. I tried hard so I could be praised in my family. I was goody-two-shoes.

    I don't know what kind of a rebel I was. The nothing kind, I suppose.

    Then I quit my job to write, and somehow felt few rules broken. I was okay with breaking them, though the pressure from awkward glances and whisperings in the big family was hard to take at first. And I'm a single woman in my 30s, so that's few more big rules broken and more awkward glances & whisperings from the big family. And I'm quiet. I don't bother to explain much. I kind of like some of my goody-two-shoeness because I quite like being good, or knowing what's right and worth standing up for. I don't break out screaming to be free. I like breaking into eccentricity quietly.

    I'm a quiet-heck-with-the-rest kind of rebel, I suppose. I like it better this way. :)

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    1. Oh yes Claudine! A quiet-heck-with-the-rest kind of rebel. Just following your call to write, regardless of others’ opinions shows the spirit in you -the spirit that stands for what’s right for YOU. Rebels don’t have to be militant, just true their calls. Everyone who stands firm in the face of misunderstanding is a hero. I’m thankful to have met such an inspiring soul as you Claudine. Oh, and it’s great to have you back!

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  27. "Transforming Altoid tins into treasures. She’ll go to sleep and paint her dreams in the morning, measure truth by their content…" Ohh my, I loved that one sentence! It cast me back to childhood, watching my GrandDaddy in the barn in the winter, making beautiful art out of greenery, pine cones, grapevines and twine, producing holiday wreaths. I learned from him that the most mundane object can be turned into a treasure. I also learned as a child that magic does exist, if you choose to see it, choose to seek it.

    And this is where and how I have always been different, in what I call a musical manner. The world looks, sounds, feels, tastes and smells lyrical to me in my head, and I translate the sounds into words. And yes, I wrote a blog about this!! You knew I would, right?!

    Much love, my darling girl. <3

    - Dawnie

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    1. Where is that blog post Dawnie? I want to read it!!!

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    2. Sorry for the delay in reply, Debra! Here is the link:

      Musical Thoughts - http://healingmorning.blogspot.com/2009/11/musical-thoughts.html

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  28. girl with the squirrel in her bosom..

    what a lovely idea debra..

    i really enjoyed the dream..

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